This is what laughing at your own stupidity looks like.
In LA I got snippy with a cab driver after drinking too much whiskey and called him "bro" in the least flattering connotation because he thought my drunk texting was me lighting up a cigarette.
Every time I play the game Never Have I Ever, "I've never smoked a cigarette" is my go-to move. Gets 'em every time. (I really haven't, nor will I ever).
Instagram is like social media crack to me. I should maybe wean myself off, but WHAT IF I MISS A BEAUTIFUL PHOTO OF ICE CREAM OR A STARBUCKS CUP? It's too much. I just can't even.
Despite my strong compulsion to have my photo taken in front of all the things, I hate asking randoms to take one for me. Stranger anxiety FTW.
I've been playing around with the idea of writing a novel for quite a while now but I haven't written a single word of it. Pretty sure by the time I actually write it, it will be much like Nick Miller's zombie novel with a no-word word search in the middle of it. Who wants to pre-order a copy?
Every time I work out, I feel so accomplished that I convince myself that it's okay to not do it again for a week (or two). I'm still feeling a little smug about the fact that I went running twice while visiting Florida. That was two weeks ago. I haven't gone running since.
I essentially stopped plucking my eyebrows all together. I did this to make up for the fact that I pull them out with my fingers when I'm bored/stressed/especially greasy. I think the thicker brows are contributing to my chronic baby face.
I can't remember the last time my sausage pup had a bath. I keep thinking about how I should do that but then I don't.
That last statement also applies to my car, inside and out.
I have two unpacked suitcases in the middle of my floor and the thought of unpacking them is just far too overwhelming.
While attempting to board my flight home on Monday, I completely tripped over some dude's carry-on. It was not graceful. Then I almost did it again on someone else's rolly number and laughed uncontrollably by myself for about five minutes.
Linking up here.