It might just be me, but I think John Cusack has played some of the coolest, most quotable characters ever. In fact, I think I have a big fat crush on the guy.
I mean.. look at him. Lloyd Dobler in "Say Anything." That goofy coat, those sweat pants, the boom box, Peter Gabriel.. Perfection. Diane Court didn't deserve him. Just saying.
He's a hopeless romantic, but in a quirky, funny, not-so-smooth kind of way. He talks too much and he speaks honestly.
"I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that."
"I am looking for a dare to be great situation."
"The rain on my car is a baptism, the new me, Ice Man, Power Lloyd, my assault on the world begins now."
Then there's Rob from "High Fidelity."
"What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?"
Rob is a selfish prick. A womanizer who makes mixtapes and owns a record store. He's heartbroken because of his own douchebaggery, and I can't help but love him.
"I can see now I never really committed to Laura. I always had one foot out the door, and that prevented me from doing a lot of things, like thinking about my future and... I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments."
So much truth.
"The making of a great compilation tape, like breaking up, is hard to do and takes ages longer than it might seem. You gotta kick off with a killer, to grab attention. Then you got to take it up a notch, but you don't wanna blow your wad, so then you got to cool it off a notch. There are a lot of rules."
Lastly there's Martin from "Grosse Pointe Blank." A professional hit man who just so happens to still be in love with his high school sweetheart. So conflicted. So cute.
"I freaked out, joined the army, went into business for myself, I'm a professional killer."
"They all have husbands and wives and children and houses and dogs, and, you know, they've all made themselves a part of something and they can talk about what they do. What am I gonna say? 'I killed the president of Paraguay with a fork. How've you been?'"
Okay, maybe I'm a psychopath too.
On a different note..
Not that this doesn't also make me chuckle (in a sad, "what were you thinking?!" kind of way)... But I strongly encourage you to watch one or all of these movies if you haven't already, and then come back here and lust after the young, beautiful version of John Cusack with me.